The Perfect Evangelist's Wife

Years ago, when I went off to college, I knew that I wanted to serve God with my life.  I wasn't sure in what area I would one day serve, but I was open to whatever He had for me.  It was in college that I met the man who would one day become my husband.  He was focused on one thing: evangelism.  As our college years passed, I saw God opening doors for him in many areas, but they all confirmed the direction he was already heading.  As our relationship grew, I began to consider whether or not I had what it took to be the wife of an evangelist.  I mean, really - all that traveling, staying in a different place all the time, living life on the road?  From all accounts, it was not an easy life at all, and I wondered, was I really capable of handling such a life?  God, in His own way, and in His time, eventually led me to the place that I knew that whatever this adventure would entail, 

it was what He had chosen for me.

I began to observe other evangelist's wives.  These resilient women seemed to have it all together - all the time!  In my mind, I began compiling a list of all that I needed to be in order to be the perfect evangelist's wife.  The list went something like this:

1. She always looks as if she just stepped out of a magazine.
2. Her house/trailer (which is also magazine worthy) is spotless and ready for company at any time.
3. She is able to hold lengthy and knowledgable conversations on any subject with anyone, even if they only give monosyllable answers, and never says too much or the wrong thing.
4. She never raises her voice to her children (or husband) even after 37 straight hours in the vehicle. 
5. She sews all of her families adorable matching outfits, and her children never look as if they were in a fight as they walk through the doors of the church.
6. She home schools her children in the mornings (they are always done by lunchtime) and participates tirelessly in the evening services by helping with music and teaching children's meetings.
7. She can manage her entire household on a budget of $50 a week, even with half a dozen kids, because she clips coupons and shops sales.  
8. She can play the piano and sing like and angel, and all her children are accomplished as well, since she spends time teaching them every day.
9. The meals she fixes are culinary masterpieces, and always healthy for the whole family.
10. Bible study and prayer are accomplished early in the morning, while the children are still asleep.
11. She literally can do anything, including speak in front of large groups without fainting, crying, or succumbing to fits of nervous laughter.

The list was much longer than that, but you get the idea.  I think at some point, she could even fly, but I digress.  

The point is, we all have expectations of what we think an evangelist's wife should be.  I would be willing to say that most of our expectations for ourselves are so far from reality that we are actually embarrassed by our seeming lack of conformity to the high standards we have placed upon our own selves.  

The most fundamental advice I can ever give is this:

Be yourself.

God knew you and your capabilities when He chose you to be your husband's helpmeet.  Your husband did not choose you because of your ability to sew, sing, play, cook, teach, or even fly!  He chose you because he wanted your companionship. The qualities he saw in you led him to believe that you were fully equipped for whatever path God chose for the two of you.  

I am not saying that these other qualities and abilities are unimportant, but they are not the most important.  God has given each of us gifts in different areas.  How we develop and use those gifts is our responsibility, but He does not expect you to burn out trying to be someone else!  So today, let go of those unrealistic expectations you have for yourself, and allow God to use you just as you are.  Spend time being, not just doing.  I am not saying that having a clean house and a balanced budget should fall by the wayside.  However, if your house is a bit dusty and maybe even messy, don't feel as if you are a total failure.  If you feed your kids McDonalds or frozen pizza, don't worry - they will not be ruined for life.  

Take time to deepen your relationship with God and allow Him to help you grow into the person He wants you to be.  By being the person God wants you to be, you will be able to be the helpmeet and partner in ministry that your husband needs.  That is the definition of the perfect evangelist's wife!